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Single & Ready To Jingle or Fruitcake Miserable?

Tis the season to be with your loved one but what happens when your loved one doesn't want to be with you? Have you ever been told to go kiss someone else under the mistletoe? Is 2005 ending with some subtle suggestions about a 'New Year, Fresh Start' ? Or maybe you've been the one to throw an icy snowball on your partner this season.

Did you spoil someone's wishes or were you the one scratched off the wish list?

Tell us about your Holiday Hell or Hurray without your partner.

Everyone gets hurt at one time or another. Of course being told to kiss someone else under a mistletoe would hurt me more just because it's the Holidays. We all know that we won't die, even though it feels like we might. What you have to keep in mind is that things always have a way of working out. Who's to say that they are 'the one' ? Someone who has no consideration for your feelings is definitely not the one for you. Maybe for someone else, but not for you. The best thing is to get out more and forget about them. Why must forgetting them have to be a sad ordeal? This could be a blessing in disguise.

Cappuccino Girl

The Holidays are not a time to break up with someone. If you tolerated each other for 350 some days why end it now? You can't really plan with your heart but you know when you enjoy/love someone and when you don't. If you want change in your life you should end things with your partner so that both of you have enough time to heal and maybe find someone more appropriate to start the New Year. Of course, you can't stop your lover from breaking it off with you. If that's the unhappy case then there's just no choice but to try and make the best of it. Things happen for a reason even if the timing doesn't seem right.

Espresso Chick

I can't say I've been hurt yet but I know I've hurt others unintentionally. Some people are not ready to settle down and some people are just not meant to be in a relationship. They have certain issues with themselves and hurt everyone they get involved with.

Molly, Texas

My girlfriend and I have been on and off for years. As it is now we're together. We both have taken turns with breaking it off with one another. But we think that in a dysfunctional world this is a functioning relationship and we are happy.

Annette, New York

If someone dumps you during the Holidays then just move along, have fun and meet as many people as you can. Why bother to mope around thinking about someone who didn't care about you in the first place?

Norma, Florida

It's cruel to wait and finish off a relationship during X-Mas or Hannukah. Five years ago my lover back then left me right before the New Year's. I'll never forgive her for doing that to me.

Beth, New Jersey

My girlfriend didn't tell me anything she just left me standing by the mistletoe waiting for her. Little did I know that she was busy kissing her ex girlfriend under another mistletoe in another state. All I can say is that at least we weren't living together. At first I was sad and feeling sorry for myself. But then my friend shed some light on me. She asked me why I was so miserable crying over someone who didn't care too much about my feelings. And that's when it hit me, why should I? That's all it took to snap some sense into my head.

Becky, California

People place too much emphasis on these days. They are really like any other day. I've been dumped and have broken off with lovers during this time of the year. I see it as the perfect time to start again. Why would I want to spend the Holidays and New Year's with someone I don't love or doesn't love me?

Liz, Oregon

I suffer from depression and when my girlfriend left me right on New Year's day I was devastated. I didn't eat and I would sleep all day long. Needless to say this was not good. I even thought of committing suicide. Facing the New Year without her was unbearable at first. I thank God I didn't follow up on those thoughts because during that Spring I met my partner and we've been together ever since.

Anna, Michigan

I left my ex when it was pretty close to Christmas. I felt a bit bad about it but our relationship had really ended a while back. We weren't close, we were always arguing. I knew the holidays were going to make it worse. She always liked to go spend time with her family and then her family and then her family!!! So I thought I'd give her an extra reason to go spend it with her family. I'm actually happy I spend X-mas by myself and I look forward to starting this year single and available.

Jean, Texas

I don't think it has anything to do with the Christmas. I think it's not important when you break up but how you break up. I've had relationships that have ended nicely and we've even shared some holiday time together, after having broken up and then I've also had nasty endings during a time of the year that's not 'special'. It really doesn't matter, what's really important is the respect or lack of it when you and your lover decide to go your different ways.

Patty, Conneticut

This is so funny! My ex and I just broke up during the last days of 2004. We spend Christmas together and it was hell. A few days before the year came to an end we mutually decided we didn't want to be together anymore and I couldn't be happier about that agreement. I agree with some of the girls here when they say that it's better to start the new year alone and with the hope of finding someone better. There's no better time to tell someone who doesn't appreciate you, enough!

Meg, Florida

I wish I could be as optimistic and happy about a break up. Maybe it's because I just broke up with my first girlfriend ever, but right now I just feel like my world is crashing down on me. I don't really know what to do with myself. I'm not sure if the holidays made it worse or not but it's a terrible feeling seeing so many happy people together enjoying these days and you are there alone and sulking. I can only hope that I later come to see the end of my relationship in a better light like some of you do.

Kelly, New Jersey

12/06/05

Last year, my then girlfriend started picking fights with me right when December started. After a couple of weeks of constant bickering she left. Turns out she went to live with some other woman she had set her eyes on. So I was left to have a not so very merry holiday season by myself. Sometimes, you have no choice.

Josie, NY

12/06/05

A few years ago I dated a woman who was very nice and generous with me. I still think that she's a wonderful woman but I had no real feelings for her. So when Christmas was coming, I wanted to have fun, party and find the love of my life so I decided it was best to call it quits right there and then. I guess she must have been sad but I had to do it. Now, I'm with the best woman ever and my Christmas is going to be fantastic!

Leila, Michigan

12/06/05

Any time of the year is a good time to fall in love. Also, any time of the year is OK to let someone go if you don't feel the same way she does. I don't think it matters much if it's Christmas, Valentine's or any other 'special day'. I've been broken up with a few days before important moments but I'm mature enough to understand that life is tough and you have to put up with what comes your way.

Patty, Texas

12/8/05

Last Christmas I was dogged by my ex b*tch of a girlfriend. She waited until Christmas Eve to lay it on me that she was "just not feeling for me the way she used to". What fine timing she has. Yes, Christmas is another day of the year but, to me, it means a lot to spend it with people I love and I was under the impression that things were all right. Maybe not great but things weren't going so wrong. For her to dump that on me during this time of the year was like a bucket of cold water. Looking back now she did me a favor and I plan to have a BLAST this year.

Michelle, California

12/8/05

I was told that maybe it's best for me to go kiss someone else under the mistletoe. The words were exchanged under our hot temperament and after the anger dissipitated we never really got a chance to clear things up because little after that she died suddenly. So to all those people out there who have a chance to be happy with someone this Christmas, take full advantage of it.

"Woodstock", Florida

12/12/05

Sometimes it takes a moment like Xmas to notice that your lover is not the one you really want to be with. I know it might not be the best time to break up but you have to do it at some point. I broke up with my girlfriend a couple of weeks ago. She had the biggest tantrum because she had already made plans for the holidays and New Year. But that's too bad! You can't really plan everything in life. All I know is that I plan to look for my true love and I hope to find her. I don't care what holiday it is.

Carla, Florida

12/14/05

When someone is shitty to you it doesn't matter what day of the year it is, they need to go to hell and fast. My girlfriend was a total bitch, flirting with half the women out there, sending them flowers and gifts behind my back. Well now she can go send them behind someone else's back because I'm going to be alone this Christmas but I'm going to have a great time without her. Anyone up for some fun here in NY?

Jessie, NY

12/17/05

I'm spending Christmas without a lover this year for the very first time. My ex left me just about a month ago. I'm pretty sad still and I didn't think I was going to be spending these normally magical days by myself, but I am. I take comfort though in knowing that there are many wonderful ladies out there waiting to be love, me included. I look forward to the new year and the hopes of finding true love.

Hannah, Virginia

12/18/05

Just cause your holidays are gonna suck doesn't mean you have to ruin the party for everyone else. My ex girlfriend was a depressed girl who always found a way of bringing me down. Well she ain't gonna do that to me one more time. I called it quits with her in November. Some of our friends are telling me I was mean to break up with her now but I think it's all good. She can go be with her miserable self. I'm going to spend it with wonderful me. :)

Toni, NY

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